It’s the spot that drives me to homicidal mania.

My husband has that same uncanny knack, but since he’s able to tap into other spots, I permit him to live–on a day by day basis. 

By the way, I’m not talking about canned pork shoulder meat with ham meat added, I’m talking about the daily infestation of unwanted email from crazy people on the other side of the planet. (For their sake they had best be on the other side of the planet.)

I don’t get the purpose of spam. Does anyone really buy any product or service based on this junk mail? I mean, I know that if even a tiny percentage of suckers bite, it’s supposed to be worth the spammers while, but…the links generallly don’t work on this stuff and return mail is blocked.

Oh, yes. In the early days of my email and internet orientation, I did try and hunt down some of these folks–just out of curiosity. I wouldn’t have actually injured anyone. Not seriously. Not permanently. Now it flies directly to a folder labeled DIE, DIE, DIE!!! I glance at it periodically to make sure I’m not jettisoning something I actually need, but rarely am I.

As I study these revealing subject headers I can’t help but wonder who the heck would be likely to want to investigate an offer of:

Re: MifueVIAjAGRA

Re: qoswyVIAjAGRA

Re: genesVIAjAGRA

Of course every header isn’t so nakedly clumsy. I also get:

Re: asfparmxyjjt ep mi eikp bn

SAY AGAIN? I mean, could musical code from space aliens be more cryptic? Would any sane person (barring Fox Mulder) click on such an email?

And what’s with the “Re:” Like I’m going to be fooled into thinking someone is responding to an email I sent involving asfparmxyjtt ep mi eikp bn?

Or the ones that come in Spanish or with Sanskrit headers. I guess it’s Sanskrit. My Arabic isn’t what it should be in these Global Economy/End of Days days.

Of course they aren’t all in riddles. Some are in the Queen’s Own English, but they still don’t make sense.

Re: Squawk Box Equity

Fwd: Population varying

Huh? I guess these are supposed to hook in the reader in the way a good book title does. MY WICKED LOVING LIAR or FORBIDDEN IS THE FIRE or PASSION’S PRETENDER.

And speaking of the romantic approach:

Can’t be a lover anymore?

Girls don’t like you?

She will thank you!

Field test

I confess I was a tad curious about the field test, but I don’t have time, really.

Anyway, it’s not like I begrudge people making a living or that I don’t have a sense of humor. I have tools to protect me against spammers. It only takes a few minutes every day to weed through the 60 - 100 junk mail messages I receive on average.

I guess what really gets me is the fact that on any given day my spam folder is about twice as full as my In Box. 

But I shouldn’t say that too loudly. Tomorrow my spam folder will be full of comforting offers like:

Worried about your blood plessure? We can holp!