Crazy week here, so forgive the lack of a formal Virtual Cocktail Party. Might I suggest a gin and tonic for a hot summer day? Pour it while I tell you about some of the myriad discoveries made during my last days in Chicago.

First, I learned that a person can, in fact, only eat so many blue cheese burgers in a single week. How many? Three. And you won’t enjoy the last few bites. It’s tragic. Really.

Second, Renee and I have solved the mystery of the Shrinking Slices of Cake.

We walked for cake again. It’s becoming a Sunday tradition and we’re such old hands at it now that on Monday, when I walked from River North to Borders on Clark and Diversey (a mere three-and-a-half miles), it felt like strolling to the corner to pick up the Sunday Times. Restrain yourself from mentioning that there are closer bookstores, blah blah blah. This was the day of the Pedicure Gone Wrong and other assorted fiascoes and, if you fully understood, you’d agree I had few options.

But I digress.

Renee and I have little habits when we walk to Andersonville. For example, when Renee starts to feel tired I say helpful things like, “Hey! We’re almost at Wrigley Field!” Which is inane because, 1. I say it when we’re still miles from Wrigley Field; and 2. Wrigley Field is miles from cake. But Renee’s kind enough to play along, and perks up at once. She knows, though, that it’s only when she sees this sign, that we’re getting close.

This week, we were lucky enough to be joined by our dear friend, Darwyn Jones, who lives in Andersonville and only had to walk a handful of blocks for a quick dinner and drink (Sprecher Black Bavarian, which you wouldn’t think would make you want cake, but you’d be wrong). And then it was cake. Now. Remember last week, when Renee’s piece was insultingly small?

It happened again. And this was when we learned that there’s nothing more important than having the right person cutting your cake.

The three of us let out a collective ooooh-ahhhh at the sight of a White Chocolate Raspberry concoction, and while the helpful woman behind the counter continued to list the rest of the day’s selection of cakes, a lovely man who has been more than charming every time we’ve seen him handed us a sample of the White Chocolate Raspberry. A sample that was just about the right size for an ordinary dessert. The three of us devoured it (sadly, it was too sweet) and Renee ordered Red Velvet.

The woman cut it: Small and kind of sad looking.

Darwyn and I ordered carrot cake.

The man cut it: ENORMOUS.

Take a look at the injustice here (and, really, look at Darwyn’s piece–have you ever seen a more insanely large slab of dessert?).

So I guess when you want an obscene dessert, go for the guys.

Tune in next week when the Virtual Cocktail Party will be back with the always fabulous J.A. Konrath. In the meantime, take a look at a couple of pictures pictures from my Chicago send-off, which was heaps and heaps of fun and culminated with dessert at Clark Dog. Because sometimes a girl doesn’t want something sweet…

xo
Tasha